Words Needing Music

It is not happiness The filling of empty vessels From unstable roots to reasoning peaks Inside deep and deepest It is not purpose But a folly The merciless campaign of waters against an aimless wall It is not peace Aquiring heavy diamonds Soon to be trinkets Since a worthless consumer, buys not, worth It is not compassion For how can forward be, it When inward it never was Unknown made unexpressed It is not love But a mistake It feels so lovely It is not so 

I dwell on strange reverse kingdoms Where kings and queens are all And a commoner only me A soaring terrible beast my spirit It's vast searing wings singe It's vaster prison A young bloom never watered Forever young I remain Parched Toiling reason into a passion For passion to abate A stupendous stupid endeavour

I'm wondering why noone calls him Greg. Must've happened once or twice but I don't remember it. Everyone calls eachother by their last names in this show. I see myself in him all the time. Unfortunately not the brilliance. Ok.. perhaps the brilliance too, if you'll allow me a moment or two, of narcissistic self discovery. 'Addicts lie..' 'You avoid pain, and caring is pain sometimes..' '-I wanted to be there..  -That's not enough...' I'm watching in a dimly lit room. The coziness and the quiet, somehow stroke my own pet fear. In a moment of connection I open my lips and say : 'Why did you have to take the drugs and be there?... Why don't be this same you without them?...'  My gaze immediately travels a thousand yards. Like of shellshock victims.  I didn't tell, him, this.  I told myself.  Did it really have to happen like this? Life I mean. Did I have to hurt and get hurt to learn and grow? And now? What happens to them? T